Hold Me Tight® is a two-day intensive weekend workshop for couples.
Everyone needs a secure bond with another. This bond offers us a safe haven in the world. Couples get in distress when they become disconnected and that bond does not feel secure. This is a transformative workshop based on the therapy model Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy by Sue Johnson. This workshop will help you better understand romantic love and the pivotal moves and moments that define you relationships. It will help you better understand yours and your partner's emotional responses and needs and you'll be able to describe and control negative interactions and spirals that create pain and distance. You will be able to shape the positive moments of reaching and responding that create a secure bond. A safe, loving, lasting love is entirely possible if we have a map. This is an educational workshop that provides that map. 2018 Hold Me Tight® Workshop Schedule (Click on dates to register, Cost is $500 per couple)
Hold Me Tight® workshops are held from 10am to 6pm on Saturday and 9am to 5pm on Sunday, with an hour and half break for lunch on your own each midday.
Coffee, water and light snacks will be provided throughout the workshop.
The workshops are held at 10421 Hickory Path Way, Suite 102 Knoxville, TN 37922
For those coming from out of town, recommended area hotels and restaurants will be provided.
The cost for the weekend is $500 per couple.
The workshop format will be broken up into multiple segments where you will have opportunityto work on exercises privately as a couple.
Group size is limited to 10 couples. You will not be asked, or required, to share during the group portions of the weekend.
It is highly recommended that you read Hold Me Tight, the 7 Conversations of Love by Sue Johnson prior to attending the workshop.
What is a Hold Me Tight® workshop and who is it for?
The Hold Me Tight® workshop is a registered trademark of Sue Johnson, the founder of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. It is for any couple who may be struggling in their relationship, or any couple who wishes to strengthen their bond and connection with one another and deepen intimacy.
Sue Johnson, the founder of EFT and the writer of the book Hold me Tight, on which this workshop is based was quoted as saying, "The Paradox of Love is the person that is our safe haven, our emotional home, is also the person that is the most dangerous, because they are the one who can hurt us the most.” It is a simplistic statement, but one that is so complex and profound to how we relate to one another in our intimate relationships.
There is a universal truth among humans, much like the physical body, we may all look different, but the universal truths are we all need oxygen to breath, blood to flow, a heart to beat, to stay alive. Our emotional body isn’t much different. While we all have different experiences and beliefs, we all have different stories and different wounds, there are some universal truths among us. We all want to be valued, to love and be loved, to be seen. It is wired in us. We are social beings, meant to live in connection with others. This is wired in our brains and there is lots of research to back this up. But rather than bore you with the scientific details, I believe in our hearts we all know this to be true. Isolation is the most painful human experience. To be isolated from, rejected by, abandoned by or ignored by important others, causes pain and distress in all of us, no matter our background, gender, ethnicity or religion.
While all couples are different, and create a unique dynamic when they come together, there are some universal truths about what causes couples distress in their intimate relationship with one another. Because of this, there are some tried and true ways that we now know to help couples pull out of these negative patterns and create a safe, connected, secure loving bond with one another. A safe emotional home, rather than a dangerous minefield.
How will this Hold Me Tight® workshop help us?
In your relationship you may wonder, why do we fight about such petty things. It seems like an argument starts over how someone loads the dishwasher, and the next thing you know, it has escalated to harsh words and silence, both of you bewildered, wondering how this happened. Maybe you don’t really fight, but there is this quiet distance between the two of you, a great divide that you feel helpless and hopeless to bridge. Or maybe there has been a betrayal that has occurred, and no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to put it behind you and trust your partner again. You wonder why these hurts from the past can’t seem to let go of their grip on you, and it comes up again and again, much to both your dismay.
Maybe you wonder why the ease of your relationship early on when you laughed together and had such fun, seems to be filled with a lack of knowing what to say to each other anymore. These and more are stories I hear from couples all the time who come to therapy. They still love each other, they still want to be with each other, but they don’t know how to connect with one another anymore. They are stuck in feelings of resentment, bitterness, loneliness and isolation and they aren’t even sure how they got there and, even if they may have some ideas about how this happened, they certainly don’t know how to find their way back.
EFT (Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy) is an empirically tested model of couple therapy that has shown excellent outcomes with many different kinds of couples. There is also follow-up research that demonstrates the lasting effects of EFT interventions and research on precisely how change occurs in this approach. Over the last two decades, EFT has developed as a systemic and powerfully effective approach to reducing relationship distress and helping couples to create trust and intimacy. The ultimate goal of EFT is to enable partners to not only reduce conflict and distance, but to shape their relationship into a more loving secure bond.
What will be doing during this workshop?
There will be portions of the workshop where we will meet as a group. You will not be asked, nor required, to participate during group time. You will primarily be presented with information and in learning mode. You will then break off into private time with your partner to do various exercises. As you and your partner work through these exercises, therapists will be checking in with you and available if you find yourselves a bit stuck.
Through a series of seven conversations, as a couple, you will learn: • The science of attachment, our wired in need for connection, acceptance and support from our intimate partner • The patterns of interaction that prevent or sabotage the very closeness we seek • To become aware of those patterns when they appear, and learn to stop them • To establish new patterns of communicating and connecting, based on love and the need for attachment • To carry this new understanding and new skills forward in time, to continue to nourish, deepen and grow your relationship.
Who this program is not appropriate for?
This program is not appropriate when:
There is an explicit and obvious lack of commitment to the growth of the relationship by one partner.
There is evidence of significant physical or emotional abuse in the relationship to the point that one person feels fear of the other.
There is an active ongoing substance abuse addiction or an active affair going on with one partner.
Who are the facilitators?
Dana Vince, MA, LPC/MHSP EFT Supervisor Certified EFT Therapist Learn more about Dana HERE
Jodi Clarke, MA, LPC/MHSP EFT Trained Therapist Learn more about Jodi HERE
We are a group of therapists dedicated to providing our Knoxville community the utmost therapeutic service and care, using the evidence-based model of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for individuals, couples and families.
In addition, we are dedicated to teaching and training other therapists in the Knoxville community who are interested in practicing EFT.
10421 Hickory Path Way, Suite 102 Knoxville, TN 37922